It's been 4 months since my last blog and my God it has been busy. I'm currently in my final two weeks of my last semester as an undergraduate at Kean University. Barring any kind of insane failure, I'll be able to graduate with a GPA of roughly 3.7 which would make me an honors graduate. That's the goal at this point, so I just have to finish strong and that will be achieved.
Despite all the good that has been going on in my life I lost a friend who I considered my brother. I don't know what I did to change his feelings towards me in a negative way, but after thinking a lot I can to some realizations on the subject that I'm fairly certain I can say on here without ruffling any feathers. For the past X amount of years I've been there for this person when he's needed someone to talk to. I've seen him at his greatest lows and was always there to try and give helpful advice. Something happened a while back and this person started to slowly drift away to a different scene, the bar scene. Still, I was there for him to talk to when a girl made him feel like an idiot, or when his other friends accused him of doing some really messed up things. Since the last time I've talked to him, from what I gather his life has not improved, but his drinking has greatly increased. So I came to this conclusion. I was only needed in this person's life when things were not going the way he wanted them to. When depression and anger were at an apex. My generally negative attitude towards drinking and for that matter smoking, led to a lot of deception. Two instances that come to mind was when I saw him at Quick Check smoking away on a cigarette. After avidly claiming he doesn't smoke. The other instance involved him ditching out on me to go to a bar. Not trying to air out dirty laundry, but these are my justifications to my feelings. So I figure that I am probably better off without this person. If he decides that our friendship is more important than the bars he gets thrown out of, I will be more than willing to try and reconcile, but for now I will move on.
So that's the one negative thing. Moving back to the positives that have been going on for the last 4 months... Work has been going really well. I've had several really cool opportunities that I am happy to have been offered. Two of the most recent was doing a shark program for teachers and another was an outreach to the Staten Island Zoo which ended in meeting a New York Congressman and learning a bit about Rattlesnakes and Desert Tortoises. It was quite interesting to me seeing as I have two snakes of my own. It was nice getting some other professional perspectives on the venomous side of snakes. So work at the Aquarium continues to go smoothly and I've opened up a bit to some more co workers, which is a good thing I think. Of course I still have the group that I consider a second family at this point. Even in my personal sadness of the Alligators having to move south, I've kept a really positive attitude considering the Penguin exhibit is finally under construction.
My braces are finally off and my teeth are now straight. Oddly enough my tooth has not chipped since it was repaired, so I'm thinking that the braces certainly did their intended job of not allowing my one tooth to slam the corner of the other. I've gotten back into Starcraft II a lot recently thanks to the game Desert Strike which is a great strategic tug o war game in a Starcraft environment. As far as playing YuGiOh, I currently have just 2 decks that I play with from time to time with friends at school. Other than that, I hardly play anymore.
Lauren and I are still together. It's getting close to 4 years. This semester has really been a test for both of us. She has had an incredibly rough semester compared to my 1 class. She's been incredibly stressed, which is totally understandable, so I have been trying my best to try and keep her head up. I really doubt I would be able to do this for anyone else. I think about my past girlfriends and I think what I really would have done for them. I really can't say that I would have been able to do what I have done for any of them. I can't believe how lucky I am to have Lauren when I look at my exes. One has a kid and is 2 years younger than I am. One has had 2 abortions and she's younger than me. Lauren? She's kept my head on straight and I've done what I can to keep hers' on as well. At some point during the summer I would like to take her somewhere for a weekend to unwind and have some fun after such a stressful semester. We'll have to see how that works out though. Love can do some crazy things and realistically, without her I really question just how motivated I would have been to continue through school past OCC, let alone how much I have improved mentally.
So if you read this blog in full, thank you for reading and remember to do this to stay healthy...
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